I woke up early, and took Alex to work. I went home and started finishing some of the last of the baby laundry. Everything was normal. I hadn't had any braxton hicks, or major back pain all morning. When I went to the bathroom I felt like I had pee'd my pants, but I definitely didn't pee my pants. I text Alex and said "so I think my water just broke?" And he replied, "no way..."
I always expected it to be more, but I had lower fluid at some of my previous dr appts so I didn't really know. So I went and picked Alex up and we headed to Alta View Labor and Delivery.
We got there at around 10:50AM, and they sent me to a room to change and the nurse came in to check and see if I was dilated and if my water had really broken. She checked and I was dilated 2cm (I was 1/2 a cm at my dr appt a week before), but she said my water did not break. She put some monitors on my stomach to monitor baby's heart, and contractions. She was going to monitor me for a few minutes, but then send us on our way since my water hadn't broke. I was a little disappointed, but oh well.
About 10 min after she checked me, I felt gushes of fluid coming out, soaking the bed. I panicked. I immediately hit the nurse button. I hate those things. I never know how to use it. Like it feels like I'm at a drive thru..."Can I help you?" "Uh. Can the nurse come back? Something just happened to the bed...?" I was scared because she had literally just told me that my water hadn't broken, so if my water hadn't broken what the hell just happened on the bed?! Nurse came in and I was crying. She was kind of annoyed and was like "why are you crying? does it hurt?" I said "no it doesnt hurt but you just told me my water didnt break so....this is kind of f*cking alarming to me."
We got there at around 10:50AM, and they sent me to a room to change and the nurse came in to check and see if I was dilated and if my water had really broken. She checked and I was dilated 2cm (I was 1/2 a cm at my dr appt a week before), but she said my water did not break. She put some monitors on my stomach to monitor baby's heart, and contractions. She was going to monitor me for a few minutes, but then send us on our way since my water hadn't broke. I was a little disappointed, but oh well.
About 10 min after she checked me, I felt gushes of fluid coming out, soaking the bed. I panicked. I immediately hit the nurse button. I hate those things. I never know how to use it. Like it feels like I'm at a drive thru..."Can I help you?" "Uh. Can the nurse come back? Something just happened to the bed...?" I was scared because she had literally just told me that my water hadn't broken, so if my water hadn't broken what the hell just happened on the bed?! Nurse came in and I was crying. She was kind of annoyed and was like "why are you crying? does it hurt?" I said "no it doesnt hurt but you just told me my water didnt break so....this is kind of f*cking alarming to me."
She helped me up, looked at the bed and said "oh yeah, your water just broke." Alex says, "So does that mean we are having a baby today?" Nurse said "yep, having a baby today!"
So since I wasn't contracting, or dilating, but my water broke, they had to induce me. They started my Pitocin drip at about 1:00PM, and my Dr came in at around 2:00PM to see how things were going. My Dr doesn't work on Thursdays, so I was surprised to see him. But I guess that's why he is paid the big bucks, haha. He checked me and I was dilated 4cm, and predicted I would have our baby at around 10pm-11pm and he would check back in on me later that evening.
I had the sweetest nurse (a different one from the one who we saw when we got there), her name was Heather. She checked me and watched me until shift change at 7pm. Then Heidi came in and took over. I was dilating quick, like 2cm an hour or so. By 6:30 I was dilated to a 10, so I was ready to push. Heidi called my dr and he said he couldn't be back to the hospital til later, so to slow my Pitocin drip and let me 'relax and descend' for a couple hours. Heidi said that by me 'relaxing and descending' it would make for a very easy delivery, because it allowed baby to go down the birth canal more before we pushed, so when the time came for pushing it wouldn't take much pushing to get him out.....LOL YEAH RIGHT.
I started pushing at about 8pm. Pushed for 30 second at a time, about every 5 min. Then we pushed every 3 min as contractions got closer together. I would push, and it would seem like everything was progressing, but then the baby would go back to the position he was in before I started pushing. I was exhausted by 9pm only 1hr of pushing. My epidural meds wore off (I had gotten the epidural early like 2pm). So while they called the anesthesiologist to redo the meds, I had about 20 min of contractions and labor without medication. It was horrible. I have so much respect for people who do it naturally. That was the longest 20 min of my life!! But it kicked in and all was well, and back to pushing.
My dr showed up at 10:10PM, checked me out and said I had done so much pushing I was starting to bruise. And the baby was still in that same position he was in 4 hours before....
Turns out the baby was sideways, so anytime I would push he couldn't truly descend since he was kinked in there all weird and sideways. Dr went over options with me. Said we could use vacuum or forceps. If we use the vacuum, theres a chance that it will lose suction, and if it loses suction more than 3 times they have to do a c-section. They could use forceps, but if he couldn't get a good grip on his head, they would have to do a c-section. They couldn't do both vacuum and forceps, it was one or the other. He seemed most confident with forceps so we went that route.
The next 20 minutes felt like hours...and I'm really not being dramatic with how intense those minutes felt to me.
My dr would have to try and flip him during my contractions while I pushed so it was up to me to give him that window of opportunity. It took about 5 min, but he successfully turned the baby, and now we could deliver him with a few more pushes. At this point, I was almost 2.5 hrs of pushing, and most of it was all for nothing so I had almost no energy....I felt so weak and hurt so much I had no idea how I was going to get a few more pushes out of this. But I needed to do it for baby.
After every contraction and push, everyone in the room would stop, and look at the heart monitor....baby's heart rate was dropping after every contraction. They would all stare at the monitor waiting for it to go back up, which it did each time. They could see the fear and concern in mine and Alexs faces and they would assure us that it was all ok.
A couple minutes later right before my next contraction my dr stopped, looked me in the eyes and said "Anna, you have to get this baby out...he's not doing good, he doesn't like this. You have to push, or we're going into surgery."
The baby was in distress from all the pushing, and the forceps. It was all starting to really affect him.
It's incredible how quick it went from ME being in labor, ME having to push, ME trying to deliver this baby...to this is about Cooper. This is about getting this baby, this human life, here safe.
I've never in my life been more motivated and determined to do something. I was terrified, but I looked to my right over at Alex (who never left my side), and through his tears and fear he just held my hand and told me, "you got this babe..."
Two more pushes, and there he was. On my chest, wide eyed and crying.
I'll never forget those next few minutes. Looking our baby in the eyes and telling him how proud I was of him. The first thing I remember saying to him was "I am so happy you're here...you did so good..." Watching Alex cut the cord, watching them do his measurements and cleaning him off I couldn't see him but I could see Alex. He was so proud. He kept looking over at me mouthing, "He's perfect...He's so beautiful." Alex was crying and couldn't stop smiling. Thelong awaited arrival of our baby had finally come.
So since I wasn't contracting, or dilating, but my water broke, they had to induce me. They started my Pitocin drip at about 1:00PM, and my Dr came in at around 2:00PM to see how things were going. My Dr doesn't work on Thursdays, so I was surprised to see him. But I guess that's why he is paid the big bucks, haha. He checked me and I was dilated 4cm, and predicted I would have our baby at around 10pm-11pm and he would check back in on me later that evening.
I had the sweetest nurse (a different one from the one who we saw when we got there), her name was Heather. She checked me and watched me until shift change at 7pm. Then Heidi came in and took over. I was dilating quick, like 2cm an hour or so. By 6:30 I was dilated to a 10, so I was ready to push. Heidi called my dr and he said he couldn't be back to the hospital til later, so to slow my Pitocin drip and let me 'relax and descend' for a couple hours. Heidi said that by me 'relaxing and descending' it would make for a very easy delivery, because it allowed baby to go down the birth canal more before we pushed, so when the time came for pushing it wouldn't take much pushing to get him out.....LOL YEAH RIGHT.
I started pushing at about 8pm. Pushed for 30 second at a time, about every 5 min. Then we pushed every 3 min as contractions got closer together. I would push, and it would seem like everything was progressing, but then the baby would go back to the position he was in before I started pushing. I was exhausted by 9pm only 1hr of pushing. My epidural meds wore off (I had gotten the epidural early like 2pm). So while they called the anesthesiologist to redo the meds, I had about 20 min of contractions and labor without medication. It was horrible. I have so much respect for people who do it naturally. That was the longest 20 min of my life!! But it kicked in and all was well, and back to pushing.
My dr showed up at 10:10PM, checked me out and said I had done so much pushing I was starting to bruise. And the baby was still in that same position he was in 4 hours before....
Turns out the baby was sideways, so anytime I would push he couldn't truly descend since he was kinked in there all weird and sideways. Dr went over options with me. Said we could use vacuum or forceps. If we use the vacuum, theres a chance that it will lose suction, and if it loses suction more than 3 times they have to do a c-section. They could use forceps, but if he couldn't get a good grip on his head, they would have to do a c-section. They couldn't do both vacuum and forceps, it was one or the other. He seemed most confident with forceps so we went that route.
The next 20 minutes felt like hours...and I'm really not being dramatic with how intense those minutes felt to me.
My dr would have to try and flip him during my contractions while I pushed so it was up to me to give him that window of opportunity. It took about 5 min, but he successfully turned the baby, and now we could deliver him with a few more pushes. At this point, I was almost 2.5 hrs of pushing, and most of it was all for nothing so I had almost no energy....I felt so weak and hurt so much I had no idea how I was going to get a few more pushes out of this. But I needed to do it for baby.
After every contraction and push, everyone in the room would stop, and look at the heart monitor....baby's heart rate was dropping after every contraction. They would all stare at the monitor waiting for it to go back up, which it did each time. They could see the fear and concern in mine and Alexs faces and they would assure us that it was all ok.
A couple minutes later right before my next contraction my dr stopped, looked me in the eyes and said "Anna, you have to get this baby out...he's not doing good, he doesn't like this. You have to push, or we're going into surgery."
The baby was in distress from all the pushing, and the forceps. It was all starting to really affect him.
It's incredible how quick it went from ME being in labor, ME having to push, ME trying to deliver this baby...to this is about Cooper. This is about getting this baby, this human life, here safe.
I've never in my life been more motivated and determined to do something. I was terrified, but I looked to my right over at Alex (who never left my side), and through his tears and fear he just held my hand and told me, "you got this babe..."
Two more pushes, and there he was. On my chest, wide eyed and crying.
I'll never forget those next few minutes. Looking our baby in the eyes and telling him how proud I was of him. The first thing I remember saying to him was "I am so happy you're here...you did so good..." Watching Alex cut the cord, watching them do his measurements and cleaning him off I couldn't see him but I could see Alex. He was so proud. He kept looking over at me mouthing, "He's perfect...He's so beautiful." Alex was crying and couldn't stop smiling. Thelong awaited arrival of our baby had finally come.
Time literally stood still for me for those few minutes, and in a way I wish they could have lasted forever. In life there are very few moments that are considered "life changing"...becoming a mother tops the list for me.
Cooper made me a mommy. Made Alex a daddy. Made Alex and me parents. A title and role we will have forever.
How incredible is that?
